Conflict Resolution Skills

The conflict that I am currently experiencing is the one between my father and me about my future. In his perspective, I, now 27 years old, should have got married. He worries about me, thinking that it would be hard for me to get married when my age reaches 30 because in my hometown people usually get married early. In my perspective, I want to marry someone that I love and loves me; I do not want to marry just for marriage.

 

As for this conflict or conflicts like this, I think some of the principles of nonviolent communication (NVC) and the 3R's can be adopted at the same time to resolve the conflict more productively. I would first express my respect for his perspective because I know he cares about me. Then I would choose to tell my father how I feel about and what I actually need for marriage. To be reciprocal and responsive to his concern, I would make a request, asking him to relieve himself a little and I would be more active in my marriage.

When I ask my colleagues in my workplace about how they have learned to be more effective communicators as it relates to conflict resolution skills, they shares some insights. First, we should listen carefully to others' thinking without interrupting to express our own ideas. Second, we should respect for different modes of thinking due to cultural differences. Third, when conflicts occur, instead of fighting for our own perspective, we should try to put ourselves in others' place to experience what kind of feelings others might have and be open to discuss about it to find a better way and a common ground to resolve the conflict.